"We all connect on our broken edges."
I think that was the quote of the week. This week I went on
a special-president-approved-split with Sister Leimer. A member in the
Frankfurt ward who has been very active in helping us teach our New Converts
from Iran- We picked up two other ladies and drove for an hour and a half to a
refugee tent camp in Limburg. Once there we hopped out of the car and we walked
through the gate into the camp. We were not allowed to go back into their
living quarters but there was a big tent where they could come and do German
classes and let the children play. They just stay here in the
cold/rain-slush-snow and wait to see where they will be assigned next. We
walked further in and started setting up some tables to do some German study
and also to help the kids water color.
As soon as I sat down and got the water colors out the
little children flocked to me. Most of them come from Afghanistan, Iran and
Serbia, there were toddlers and also teenagers. But everyone was so desperate
for something to do. It was a tender moment to sit there and watch the
children. I would walk around and help them color- point out the colors in
German, and also draw things for them to paint. Little girls and boys would
come running up to me to show me their little master pieces. All they really
wanted was someone to tell them that they were special that they did a good
job. I would kneel down and smile and just dote over their paintings. And they
would smile and run back to their mothers just glowing. It is amazing how none
of us could communicate linguistically but through smiles and lots of miming
and a little bit of broken English we were able to communicate. I was struck
with the desperate situation of many of these people- and how many of them were
still smiling. A young man told me about his journey coming here to Germany.
They packed all their belongings into a couple bags and began to walk for many
many kilometers, in order to get here 50 people pilled into an inflatable boat
as they traveled towards Greece. In the middle of the sea the boat began to
loose air- so they had to throw all their belongings overboard. And it almost
came to the point where all the women and children were going to gather in the
middle of the boat and the men swim along side.
There was one moment where I was just standing at the edge
of the tent watching when I was just overcome with a feeling of love. The tent
was SO loud- you could hardly hear yourself think. There were tables set up
with german teachers. There were people playing ping pong, there was a long table
of children glued to their art projects. Even adults who were sitting there
coloring- some of them were so focused on their paper they didnt notice
anything else around them. At that moment as I gazed at everyone in the room I
just felt Gods love for each of them. And I felt that this is something that I
want to do for the rest of my life.
On the car ride home I was talking with sister Leimer about
the situation of many refugees here in Germany and also how we can help. We
began to talk about charity as the pure love of Christ. How only through Christ
can we hope to understand the circumstances of these people- who have a
complete different language and culture and upbringing. Because Christ
understands them perfectly. We also talked a lot about pain, both physical and
emotional and mental and how it helps us to grow and become someone better.
I have been struggling with depression for the past 4 months
and that can be like a broken edge, a sharp pain. But it is that pain that
helps us connect with other people who are going through the same or similar
situations. Sister Leimer said that "We all connect on our broken
edges" and if we try to hide what is broken inside of us then we will not
be able to help others. Why pretend that we are perfect? There is no point to
that. I rejoice in the fact that I am mortal- that I make mistakes, that I can
sin, that I have weakness- because that shows me that Gods Plan of Salvation is
in effect. That I can change and become someone better.
Dealing with depression has been very difficult- because I
always assumed I could overcome everything- that I don't need to ask anyone for
help. But as the scary reality hit- and the confusion began to overwhelm me I
swallowed my pride and reached out for help. I talked to my mission president
and to many other people. The last three months have been a roller coaster of
finding the right balance of rest and medication and therapy. But today looking
back I don't want to hide my broken edges anymore because there are people out
there who can benefit from knowing that someone else understands at least a
little bit of what they are going through.
There were a lot of amazing moments that happened this week.
And a couple of amusing moments too.
Lets start with the amusing ones shall we? so because of the
depression I have been having a really hard time sleeping. Like a couple hours
a night- and this week in a sleepy coma at like 3 in the morning I thought the
only logical thing to do was make toast. In the morning my companion walks into
the kitchen and a couple minutes later walks out and asks, "Sister
Shurts.... why is the bread in the fridge and the butter in the utensil
drawer" .... I just threw my hands up and said. "It was a rough night
ok!" haha
anyways this week Liz was baptized. She is an investigator
that the elders have been teaching but she and I are basically sisters. She
asked me to speak at her baptismal service. She has a really cool story. She
met the elders on the street and the first sunday that she came to church she
knew that it was right. Actually the very next day she bought a dress to wear
for her baptism.
Also this saturday I found out that someone that I contacted
on the street and taught in Heidelberg got baptized!! SO that was really
exciting! :)
Basically I love you all and I can't wait to see you all in
11 DAYS!!!!!!!! GAHAHHHHAHHHHH
Love
Sister Shurts